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How to Forgive Someone Who is Sorry (Not Sorry)

How to Forgive Someone Who is Sorry (Not Sorry)

It is possible to have many encounters with people who will hurt our feelings and show no remorse for it. One of the hardest things to do is learn how to forgive someone when they cause you pain. Once you figure out how to do this, you can experience less pain from them. We cannot control others’ actions but we can control how we react. Learn some tips for how to forgive someone who is sorry, but not really.

Sorry, Not Sorry

Learning how to forgive someone who pretends to be sorry about the way they treat people, then proceeds to keep doing things that are hurtful over and over again is a hard life lesson. Here are some tips for how to forgive a person who is not really sorry:

  • Focus inward. Forgiveness is often associated with letting someone off the hook who has hurt other people, including yourself. Ask yourself what you need to feel better and work on things you control, rather than worrying about other people. You can remove yourself from the past experience and take action towards making yourself feel happy. Make yourself a priority.
  • Own your feelings. Other people will hurt us, some over and over again. When we learn to forgive them, we have to learn how to take responsibility for our own feelings. It may be challenging at first, but we can only blame others for how we feel for so long. We have to realize at some point holding grudges only hurts yourself in the end.
  • Recognize your part. One of the hardest parts about forgiveness is recognizing our own patterns. Our ego wants us to feel hurt but not take responsibility for the part we played in it. You will be able to let go of negative feelings you are holding for someone more quickly because you are forced to realize that nobody is perfect and life is about choices.
  • Let go of the past. You have to recognize this does nothing for you. What happened has happened and there is nothing you can do about it. The longer you keep holding onto those moments, the longer it takes to forgive others. Replaying those moments keep you in the past, and you will never move forward into the present and future with the past hanging onto you.
  • Tell someone you trust. If there is someone in your life you can go to that will give you an honest opinion, go to that person. Get their point of view as it may be helpful so they can shine a light on things we may not be willing to look at.

Forgiveness is a deeper practice of selfless love for yourself and others. There are many things we can do in recovery that help heal, but forgiveness may be one of the bigger things we can do. As long as we forgive on a daily basis, and refuse to let pain hold you hostage, you can start to find a better way to move forward in recovery.

Forgiveness does not happen overnight. It is a daily battle. If you are willing to offer forgiveness to others, it will help you in your recovery. We can help you take the first steps to recovery with our programs and resources. We will help you find what you need. Call us 24/7 at our toll-free number: 866-294-9401