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Forgiving Ourselves

For those of us in recovery from active addiction, we don’t need to be told how abusive we were toward ourselves. We went months, years, and even decades drinking and using to the point of oblivion. Depression, anxiety, physical injuries, and more laced our daily lives, and eventually became our normal. We beat ourselves up, and now that we’re in recovery, we have to learn to love and forgive ourselves for our past, one day at a time.

Drinking and drugging may have been fun in the beginning, usually ending in a hangover and swearing off a repeat performance. Over time, it became habit, and then it became a crutch. We began to lose our true selves, overtaken by an animalistic need to get more; more alcohol, more drugs, just more, more, more. We stopped doing the things that used to make us happy. We no longer hung out with our friends who didn’t have the “more” gene. Our families started pushing us away, so we pushed back and lost ourselves even further into isolation.

The things we did in active addiction are things we wouldn’t even consider doing in sobriety. If someone treated a friend the way we treated ourselves, we would do anything in our power to stop them. The pieces of these memories we have of our addiction are nothing but sad. We may feel a lot of shame, guilt, anxiety, and even disgust over what we’ve done, and what has been done to us. All of these feelings are normal, and a majority of us experience them, but we have to let them go.

The person you were in addiction is not who you are now. In active addiction, the disease takes over, and leaves nothing resemblant of a person, only a physical shell of a human being. You have to let it go. We cannot change our past, but we can participate in today to shape our future. Recovery gives us choices, whereas addiction took all of our choices away. If you choose recovery, you are choosing life. In this life, you can help others, and show them that they, too can forgive themselves for their past. Loving and giving ourselves forgiveness may be the most difficult part of recovery, but it is the most rewarding.

If you are struggling with addiction, we can help. Detox is the first step towards the rest of your life, and there isn’t a safer, and more private place to take that step than at the Serenity Recovery Center.  We offer a compassionate, supportive, and comfortable environment where you can begin the healing process, and start your new journey into recovery. Give us a call, we are available 24/7, toll-free at 844-339-6964. You can do this, your life can change, and you can recover.